Pieter L Valk

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Calling Gays to a Higher Standard Hurts Everyone

I recently went on the Political Animals Podcast with Jonathan Cole to talk politics, faith, and sexuality. At one point, we explored why the double standard of sexual stewardship costs Christians' credibility inside and outside of churches.

Many churches lead straight Christians to assume that they will get married, teach that we need romantic companionship to be happy, and ignore the Bible’s teachings about vocational singleness and divorce.

But then these same churches call gay Christians to a higher standard of sexual stewardship by teaching that gay Christians don’t need romance or sex and challenging them to consider vocational singleness.

This inconsistent, hypocritical application of Scripture tempts sexual minorities to adopt a victim mentality and reject sexual morality standards because of the apparent double standard.

Churches lose credibility to ask gay Christians to live according to biblical wisdom when they refuse to hold straight Christians accountable to that same wisdom.

Yet this inconsistent standard hurts straight Christians as well.

Straight Christian marriages end in divorce at the same rate as non-Christian marriages, and unmarried straight Christians suffer from a lack of support in the church.

Instead, churches can invite everyone to steward their sexualities according to God’s good and weighty wisdom.

This might include examining whether straight Christians are...
- engaging in casual romance,
- having sex outside of marriage,
- making little or no progress on refraining from the use of pornography,
- failing to consider a call to vocational singleness,
- unthinkingly refusing an openness to raising children for the kingdom in marriage, or
- engaging in unbiblical divorce/remarriage.

Admittedly, these conversations about straight sexual stewardship are difficult to have, but they're not any heavier than conversations Christians seem eager to have about gay sexual stewardship.

And failing to have these conversations with straight Christians are hurting (not helping) them.

Let's raise the standard for everyone's sexual stewardship, eliminate discriminatory application of God’s wisdom, prevent a victim mentality among LGBT+ people, and cultivate thriving in everyone's sexual stewardship.

Listen to the full episode at https://open.spotify.com/episode/6Le9FSw7vCJHrcnwVOXJNa?si=572a3a3adf67488f