Christians, "coming out" doesn't mean this...

Many choose to share on National Coming Out Day about parts of their story they've been afraid to share. If you're a Christian, know that when someone "comes out", it doesn't have to mean any of the following:

"I've given up on a traditional sexual ethic."

"I don't believe in God anymore."

"I'm dating people of the same sex now."

What *can* you assume "coming out" means?

"In some way I'm either non-straight or don't fit neatly into cultural gender norms. Ask me more to learn more!"

When someone comes out publicly, they've likely processed privately for years or decades. On average, teens wait five years after internally recognizing same-sex attractions to share with a parent or pastor.

Why do people come out? To be fully known and fully loved.

While a person's sexuality isn't the most important aspect of their personhood, it is meaningful. Until an LGBT+ person shares about this part of their story, they aren't sure where they'll be fully loved when their story is fully known.

Plus, not having to keep one's sexuality a secret anymore can alleviate stress, lead to more genuine friendships, help teens connect with peers of similar experiences, and foster healthier intimacy with God.

So if you're a Christian and one of your friends comes out today, lean in. Ask them to share more about what that means. Ask them what painful experiences have led them to hesitate sharing earlier.

And then listen.

After listening, best next steps will vary depending on how much relationship you have with the person and what role they've invited you to serve in their life.