Pieter L Valk

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Would I be celibate even if I were straight?

Some people assume that my same-sex attractions are the sole reason that I am committing to vocational singleness. Not so!

For me, celibacy isn’t a consolation prize or a second-class vocation. I'm confident God would have called me to vocational singleness even if I were straight.

It’s true that experiencing same-sex attraction and being committed to historic sexual ethics meant I couldn’t default to romantic relationship with the people I am most attracted to. My circumstances forced me to pause and think more intentionally about what my options were and what I would pursue.

But during that intentional time of discernment, I discovered that God had always planned to call me to vocational singleness, regardless of my sexual orientation. At my upcoming lifetime commitments, I will joyfully say “yes” to God’s invitation to permanently leverage my singleness for the sake of serving the poor and needy with single-minded devotion.

In the same way, the Nashville Family of Brothers isn’t just for gay men. It's a family for any Christian man, regardless of sexual orientation, called to vocational singleness for the sake of God’s kingdom. Even among current brothers, we have a mix of stories and backgrounds (like any family of God should)!

Every Christian, gay or straight, should discern whether God is calling them to vocational singleness or Christian marriage (instead of assuming their preference is God’s preference).

Are you interested in stepping into this discernment process for yourself? Feel free to reach out to me for resources!

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