Nervous about sharing your beliefs on sex ethics outside of church?! I was, and then a TikTok notification made it unavoidable. This is how I faced my fears. 😬

“A year ago when I downloaded Tiktok, I enabled a feature that allows you to see who's viewed your Tiktok profile (and vice versa)…”

In college and post-grad when Christian leaders shared testimonies about what they used to struggle with and celebrated God's provision, it was often implied (if not directly stated) that they no longer struggled. I remember internally asking, "At all? All of the temptation is gone? You never slip up ever? Even a little?" I never believed it. Do you? Sometimes I worry that I unintentionally send the same signals.

A blurb recently appeared on the Yale University Press website for a new book by Dr. Richard Hays and his son (out Sept 2024) in which it seems he'll reveal his change to a revisionist sexual ethic. Like me, many Christians over the past few decades have read Hays's 1996 "Moral Vision of the New Testament" and referred back to his earlier work to justify our commitment to historic sexual ethics. When theological heavyweights like Hays change their minds, it's disorienting for many. For me, it led to a now all-too-familiar cycle of fear, disappointment, betrayal, and hop

Checkout this chapel offered at Asbury Theological Seminary exploring God's true, good, and beautiful for gay people. Many Christians are theologically convinced of historic sexual ethics, but what we believe to be true doesn’t seem to be leading to good and beautiful in the lives of the LGBT+ people we know. As Christians, we have an inherent sense that what’s true should also be good and beautiful. So how do we make that a reality for the LGBT+ people we love?

Classic personality tests like the Big Five OCEAN assessment identify a person’s level of agreeableness. There are both constructive and destructive ways disagreeable people can show up in their families and workplaces. For better and for worse, I'm a disagreeable person.

I recently went on the Church Politics Podcast with Justin Giboney of the AND Campaign to talk about faith and sexuality, including the recent controversy around Pastor Alistair Begg and whether Christians should attend gay weddings.

What is the vocational singleness that Jesus and Paul invited every Christian to consider? Is it still a call to family? How does one discern whether they’re called to vocational singleness?

Some who know Jesus experience crippling doubt. Others who don’t yet know Jesus see a Creation in chaos. Christ’s promises seem to ring hollow, the kingdom is coming too slowly, the gospel feels feeble. Thankfully a potent vehicle of kingdom work and kingdom hope for the early Church is available to God’s people today, if we will only embrace and nourish it. Amid Christ’s ministry on earth, he instituted a vocation meant to give us hope for the kingdom to come and to bring forth that kingdom with undivided attention: the vocation of singleness.

Christian celibacy is a tragically misunderstood concept. Depictions of kingdom singleness, from Renaissance paintings to modern television shows, often misrepresent Christ's invitation and early Church practices, tempting some ordinary Christians to ignore their calling and others to indulge in a caricature of the vocation of Jesus. These thoughts swirled through my mind as I took up an invitation to spend a holiday weekend at a friend’s house in the land of 1000 lakes…

My hope for the Church is that gay celibate Christians would find real family. What kind of family are we all made for? How can vocational singles, regardless of sexual orientation, build the permanent family they need?

What if sexuality sermons centered how God made all of us for intimacy in the context of family instead of focusing on marriage and sex? I recently had the opportunity to write for Outreach Magazine about framing conversation in terms of "sexual stewardship".

As we celebrate Valentine’s Day nears, I reflect on the meaning of Christian marriage by recalling my toast at my brother’s recent wedding. The toast begins with some personal notes and focuses on the hope-giving nature of Christian marriage at 3:05 in the video.

A recent study found that 39% of Gen Zers identify as LGBTQ. In the past, Christian parents have defaulted to doubting the sexual identity of teens, leading to destructive results. What if instead, parents responded calmly, "So you're queer? Alright! God's not surprised, and His wisdom is still clear and very good for you!"

When consulting with churches about better 1-on-1 ministry to gay people, I often get the same questions. Check out Part 1 of Top 10 Questions on LGBTQ+ Topics.

Can God's wisdom be known? What should we do when God feels absent? I'm grateful for the opportunity to write for "The Living Church" in a more extended way about my evangelical deconstruction and Anglican reconstruction.

Listen to this episode of the "Where do we go from here?" podcast where Devi Abraham. Jessica Van Der Wyngaard, and I talk about purity culture and celibacy. The problem with "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" and True Love Waits wasn't traditional sexual ethics. It's that purity culture sold Christians the idol of romance.

Listen to this episode of The Kingdoms Podcast where they asked, “How can churches do better outreach and invite gay non-Christians to church?” My short answer: Start by getting the gospel right with gay Christians who already agree with you.

Netflix's "Pray Away" presents a false dichotomy between ex-gay theology and progressive sexual ethics, erasing gay celibate Christians who hold fast to Biblical wisdom while accepting that sexual orientation rarely changes.

From Fathom Magazine - Today, more Christian young adults are postponing marriage or considering never marrying than ever before, and the church at large fears plummeting marriage percentages and the declining birth rates that follow. As those numbers soften, their refrain booms louder: “If abstinent singleness isn’t easy for you, don’t worry. Just get married.” Armed with 1 Corinthians 7:9, they plead with the under-thirty crowd, “PLEASE. Get married.”

Watch this video seminar exploring whether the gospel is good news for gay people. What do I believe, why do I hold those beliefs, and what should Church do differently?